Mortal Kombat 9 Is Great For People Who Hate the Series

I've pretty much hated Mortal Kombat since I was born. While still in the hospital, my mom set up a Sega Genesis and tried to get my little midget infant self to play MK2 with her. After about five seconds, I promptly slapped everyone in the room, removed the game and tossed the system out the window. I then put the game into the mouth of the doctor who aided in my birth, and palm-chopped his jaw shut, breaking both like sugar canes.

The only exception until recently was Deadly Alliance, because it had a solid story mode and the graphics were boss. It was (and still is) the best one on PS2 and that's the only system I had that wasn't by Nintendo. Years passed and I didn't keep up with the releases because I hated all the ones prior to DA. When MK9 came out, Matt got it and I haven't turned back.

I don't know if it's the gore, or the graphics in general, or perhaps the diversity in the gameplay. There are a lot of modes and within them are several minigames. The Challenge Tower is 300 rounds long and each one is different enough to be entertaining (not to hear Matt say it, for someone who likes zombies so much he sure gets tired of killing 'em quick.) It's fun to blow off steam when the game's on easy mode, plus there's tag-out co-op and such if you actually have friends.

You can play online too, but you have to be Zeus' boner and beg for mercy from every other god in order to get someoen what doesn't pick Sub-Zero and spam the same fucking combo over and over, while you're pressed up against the wall of the ring area unable to move. Your opponent's win/loss displays before you accept the match, which is hilarious sometimes because you'll see people with retarded ratios like 384 wins/10 deaths, or if you're really lucky, somewhere in the vicinity of 500/7. Other times, if the lords of Hades aren't ass-fucking slaves, and are instead smiling upon you, the numbers are flipped, but not nearly on as vast of a spectrum. Even in that situation though, many people rage quit (myself included, if I'm being dominated like all hell. Yeah, that's right. Fuck you) or lag out, for the love of christ. Aside from all that jargen, it can be a good time.

All in all, I'm glad I have it. It's a good time waster, and I don't really enjoy classic arcade games a whole bunch (except asteroids, because it's rock solid), but that's one of them. Super good.